The Caring Corner :)


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My worry/anxiety level is pretty high atm, Miku has been unusually quiet as of late and I've got it into my head that she's fading away. The more likely reason is that she's just tired, but you just try telling me that. :rolleyes:
 
My social anxiety usually flips around, sometimes perfectly fine, the other time i have to literally run away.
 
Mine tends to be pretty consistent as to what'll set it off, so I've managed to compile a list of "do not want" situations to work on. It contains stuff like conversations longer than a few sentences, people touching me and people sitting next to me on the bus.
 
Mine tends to be pretty consistent as to what'll set it off, so I've managed to compile a list of "do not want" situations to work on. It contains stuff like conversations longer than a few sentences, people touching me and people sitting next to me on the bus.
You should take that "do no want" list and follow it entirely, at the contrary. It is called Shock therapy...

When I was younger I was very afraid of people watching to me, so I always tried to be invisible, to not use anything that should have got attention, to not change anything on my aspect to evade comments, but then the situation worsen in a way that I wasn't even able to exit from home anymore...

So one day I tried to battle this, in a very simple way, I had to be sure that people was watching me, and commenting about me... I just did nothing exceptional, but was a very hard thing to do for me... I started to keep mustaches :D it's funny saying that now, but at the time it was an apocalypse for me, because EVERYONE noted the difference and told something, and kept looking at me... but at some point I started to be accustomed to the situation... then after some time I started to leave my hair growing, to obtain the same effect... then for some time I kept changing my look constantly... now I almost don't mind if people looks at me or comments, and I'm happier :)

Also I almost like to know the worse comments about me, instead of evade/fear them, because them make me see myself from another point of view, and anyway I always can choose to follow them or trash them, but all of them makes me think.
 
Alternatively it could be a good basis for some cognitive behavioural therapy; write down what you worry will happen against your 'do not want' list, then do them, and write down what did happen. And again. Until you've proven to yourself that what you fear might happen, doesn't (any more).

That does require you to want to fix it so you can do everyday things though. I'd suggest you should, but I guess that's my assumption.
 
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Thanks for the tips. :)


Edit: An update on the Miku situation, we're having a reconnection day and it seems to be helping things no end. B)
 
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In the last time, I made some experiments since I'm always disturbed by people when trying to be left alone (and having quiet times when in my flat, that's not a given either) and since my social anxiety is directly linked to regular negative feedback because of my awkwardness and complete misunderstandings on first glance since my birth, there simply is no way to avoid and not even reducing it further than I already do, especcially since there simply is no place without humans in this metropolis no matter how long you look for it and I still haven't gotten out of here for good.

I started hiding in plain sight some time ago, sitting directly in the center between several groups in a well visited park and doing my strange stuff (like practicing on my hurdy-gurdy). To my bafflement, people do rather leave me in peace when I did this instead of trying to find the most remote corners for me and avoiding any contact. Doing this stuff always scares the shit out of me but it's a shock therapy as well as a way of gathering different feedback than I'm used to (for example: none), with heavy setbacks now and then of course.

I may never get along with 99% of the humans very well, but keeping them at a respectful distance without having to stay indoors all the time is my primary goal anyway and working quite well by now.

The main problem always were and still are old people (yes, not the Turkish or Russian gangs, I don't have problems with those at all), they don't have any respect for younger ones around here, completely ignore every strong sign of "leave me alone" and treat you like some distraction from their eventless life which they could fill with interesting things if they'd take the time instead of using it to nag, brag and distract other people (without ever listening to them), but going to places with fewer of those does reduce those encounters tremendously.

My boss who knows such problems and me quite well told me to remember and repeat a simple phrase for people who are only coming towards you to play their games: "I feel harrassed, leave me in peace" and shouting at them when they ignore this and go on.

Normally I'd never do that because I try to be friendly to the biggest assholes but I have this reaction ready by now.
 
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Youchie, Striku! :( . Absolutely time to get a mattress where the bedsprings don't attack you, me thinks. And might I also suggest putting some Savlon on it; it should help.
 
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Bit of an update, the skin appears to be knitting back together where the cut isn't so deep which is a good sign.


Coating it with Savlon was the third thing I did, after taking the photo and washing the cut. Nice to see that I have my priorities straight. ;)
 
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When I look at my hands, they are laced with little white scars - especially over the knuckles. 

there are a few serious ones, like a cut that goes across 2 fingers - was seriously deep at the time.

Most of these are due to little slips with an angle grinder - my favorite power tool.

I always completely ignore any wounds, not caring if sawdust, dirt, or paint gets into it... I just keep on working, in spite of it stinging like a b*tch most of the time.

The only time i ever do anything about it is if the blood wont stop.

... because now it is interfering with my work.

Unfortunately my disdain for the physical form has left 2 rather large permascars that are discoloured and not in any way flattering...

Usually my digits meet the edge of the grinder, resulting in what looks like a wide carved out cut. These always shrink to leave a very small barely noticeable white line a few weeks after the incident.

But this time I took off a few layers of skin on probably what amounted to an 8th of the area of the top of my hand.

I was irritated, but I ignored it as usual... the accumulating sawdust did a good job of congealing any blood, and it wasn't deep... just very wide.

Well, it took *forever* to heal.... and it did get infected, which is unusual for me.

So yes, the resulting permascar is muuuuch smaller, but still pretty big and unsightly.

This is the one time I should have treated my wound with TLC to avoid the blemish, but it's not going to stop me ignoring wounds.

But the next time the surface area is large enough, i'll think twice.

P.s. @Striku : You've got a winner there! If you were to let it permascar, the final result would look pretty good and would certainly raise questions in the uninformed observer (always a good thing).
 
Oh wonderful! 

'Quite Fluffy' is very important in FaeReality.

Ah..... *that* thread.... Have I read it? Have I participated? I just don't know...

Surely not I.... some other minx.

Oh wow... seems I did. and me dear mum too. How about that.
 
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