I Have Resigned


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Kumaki

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I just sent ED a note resigning as a Mod.

So go ahead, those of you who hate me, pop your champagne corks, you won!

Never let it be said I was removed as a Mod...I resigned.

Why?

Well...the basic reason I becamea Mod in the first place...was to give back, in the only way I could...to a community that had given to me.  since I can't code...this was all I could do.

However, recent events have made me wonder if I WANTED to give anything to this project anymore - the cruel treatment of me has been way over the top, and more than I can tolerate.

I hope those of you who were cruel to me know that I am in tears while I write this...you have hurt me that badly.  I hope you feel real good about yourselves.

I have a program in works.  Once that is done, I will probably just pull a Prometheus and leave.

I got more class than to hang out where I am so obviously not wanted.

Guess sometimes the only way you know you belong in the clubhouse is when you can cruelly tell someone else that they DON'T.

Hope you all feel real good.
 
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I think you have made the right decision. Being a mod is basically an ungrateful 'job' and it seems like you are/were too emotionally invested.    

Hope you will be able to relax now and enjoy your pandora a bit more. 
 
I guess I haven't been lurking enough to see any problems. I thought you were doing a good job and saw nobody saying otherwise. Such a shame you didn't feel appreciated. Well thank you for the work you did.
 
I for one am dissapointed you are deciding to pack it in. If you noticed I was predominantly in support of your position in that GTA thread... However I do think you let things get too personal for you... As a mod you need a very thick skin. I quite like you as a person too... I appreciate everything you've gone through in your life, and felt that in some areas at least we were of like-mind.


I'm sorry if I didn't make you feel more welcome here. I would urge you to ignore all this drama, take a deep breath, have a glass of wine, and move forward without a second thought towards those that were otherwise to you.


Before making any permanent decisions, rather take a break and come back to this when things are not so close to you.


You *will* be missed, and at least *I* will be sorry at these turn of events...
 
I have to say, I'm quite surprised by this - there's always something to be said for overcoming adversity and carrying on the face of perceived opponents.

But if you can't find the strength of character to be able to take on board the lessons you learnt as a mod then it maybe is indeed time to step down and you have my respect for doing so.

Try not to be too upset - you have many friends and admirers here who are willing to help you; you only have to accept that help.

D.
 
Yeah take a break, not at all nice that people have driven you to tears.


I'd recommend a break, come back though even if as a non-mod user and just ignore people who piss you off, block 'em if this forum supports that feature, or just ignore and rise over malicious comments.


Don't let the _______'s get you down
 
Oh man!  That's too bad!

It's ironic that in the "Losing my love for my pandora" thread I started, I felt like I was going to quick to be a Pandora user/lover, but with all the support of this forum, I decided to come back and now loving my Pandy again.  What I'm trying to say is there are more nice people here than there are bad ones (I doubt if even any).  I'm learning so much here technically as well as other stuff.  So don't let one bad apple make you throw out the whole basket.

Come on man!  We need a Pandora 2 and we need you!  :wub:
 
i'm sorry you feel this way and while i know there has been a lot of drama lately between you and a certain someone, please don't leave the community. Pandora community is filled with all kinds of people and most of them are very helpful, we would be weaker as a community if we lost you. Even if you're no-longer a mod i know people will certainly miss having you around, i know i will.
 
Sorry to hear, Kumaki....

I appreciate your work as a mod and all your other posts....

Best.
 
Good luck in whatever you decide to do, Kumaki.  Emotions maybe a bit high right now, and I'd mirror other's sentiments at this time - take a step back, relax and enjoy a small break.  Time heals most wounds...and will probably give you some more perspective on things.  Hopefully you'll stick around as a member of this great community though.  Being a Moderator isn't for everyone, and it does appear to be a rather thankless task - I wouldn't want the position.

Maybe even looking back at this thread will convince you that things tend to get blown up in our minds at times like these.  One person or a small handful of seemingly judgmental people doesn't constitute a majority.  You're liked.  Don't give up on your enjoyment of this great device and participation here because of recent events.  It kind of saddens me when I read that another forum member feels frustrated and disenfranchised from these Forums.

I know that I'm relatively new (posting) to the people here, but I've been reading/watching these forums since it's inception and I really do think that they're are a LOT of great and supportive people here.  Give them a chance...

Anyway, that's my two cents on the topic.

Good Luck, Kumaki.
 
First I'd like to echo the sentiments expressed by Franko in the above post.

For what it's worth I don't believe  anyone here actually hates you Kumaki,  nor do I believe anyone intentionally set out to hurt you.

I certainly appreciate that you want to be able to to give something back to the community, but being a mod is not the only way to do so  and I'm sure, given time, you can find another way. 

While I do think taking a step back to recover and heal is a good idea right now I also hope you'll stick around and continue to participate.

- Neelix
 
Thank you, everyone for your kind words.

I will just have to see where things go.

But I no longer have any desire to be a Mod.

Having been one on other Boards...and a current one on two Boards I own...I know it is a thankless job, and I knew it going in.

What fueled my decision to quit...was the complete and total lack of support I got - even from my own fellow Mods - who would not even so much as send a polite PM to certain people asking them to back off - and then, when that did not work - PUBLICLY asking them to stop it and back off.

I got no support, whatsoever.

I think people need to become aware that we are NOT just screen names and robots, we are REAL PEOPLE with real feelings...feelings that CAN be hurt.

People need to be aware that cruelty has an affect on people.  I felt I was unreasonably dogpiled on far too long - long after the crap should have just stopped, it continued.  And I've had all the cruelty I can bear.

Perhaps I may hang out yet.  But I've no desire to be a Mod...or, at this point, give back anything - I think any reasonable person could understand why I might feel that way.

Perhaps later, after time has healed some of the hurt..I may feel like giving back something, and hopefully somone will be able to find a way in which I may do so.

But for now, the hurt is just too fresh.
 
I don't know if you read it, but even ZXDunny gave you an advice on how to run the RPG you wanted to play, with a screenshot of the game running on the Pandora, maybe you missed it because of the black list...

I have nothing against you, and I don't want to sound too harsh, but if you didn't receive a solution for your troubles is not because no one wanted to help you, but because not everyone have the answers you need... I should have helped if I had the solution, but I never used that program like many people here...

I also have questions in the support section that no one cared about, but I will not shout at everyone because I didn't had help, if I really need something so much than I will search a solution by myself, but if it's nothing so important, I can wait patiently...

You need to keep the pressure down to resolve every problems, with both games and forum members... but you seems instead to prefer drastic solutions, and you can loose much more with those...

"He shouted at me, let's blacklist him"

"This game doesn't work, let's delete it"

"I'm a MOD to give help but seems like I can't, let's remove it"

If something doesn't work, continue trying, and if you will be able to find a solution then post it on the forum as a guide. People will thank you for this.

As a MOD you still can help the community a lot, but if you leave that status now you will learn nothing from the experience you had... everyone fails when doing something new, it works like this.

Just calm down a bit, do something else in the meantime, there's a LOT of others things to do both with the Pandora and to help the community out.

Anyway I too think that the things told to you in the GTA thread were too harsh.
 
I don't know if you read it, but even ZXDunny gave you an advice on how to run the RPG you wanted to play, with a screenshot of the game running on the Pandora, maybe you missed it because of the black list...
No sir.

He got no further than I did.

I was even able to get the title screen up...which is what he showed.

I only saw it because someone else quoted his post.

My problem with the game came later in the game, a grapical problem caused the game to be not playable - and I had wondered if there was some way to address that.

At any rate, I've put the question out on the Easy RPG Forum itself...see if anyone can make this thing run, even on a real PC with Easy RPG.

I know it runs just fine on a PC witht he original RM2K.
 
"Nobody's gonna hurt anybody. We're all gonna be three little Fonzies here, and what's Fonzie like?" (Yolanda: "cool?") "And that's what we're gonna be - we're gonna be cool."
 
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I don't know if you read it, but even ZXDunny gave you an advice on how to run the RPG you wanted to play, with a screenshot of the game running on the Pandora, maybe you missed it because of the black list...


I have nothing against you, and I don't want to sound too harsh, but if you didn't receive a solution for your troubles is not because no one wanted to help you, but because not everyone have the answers you need... I should have helped if I had the solution, but I never used that program like many people here...


I also have questions in the support section that no one cared about, but I will not shout at everyone because I didn't had help, if I really need something so much than I will search a solution by myself, but if it's nothing so important, I can wait patiently...


You need to keep the pressure down to resolve every problems, with both games and forum members... but you seems instead to prefer drastic solutions, and you can loose much more with those...


"He shouted at me, let's blacklist him"


"This game doesn't work, let's delete it"


"I'm a MOD to give help but seems like I can't, let's remove it"


If something doesn't work, continue trying, and if you will be able to find a solution then post it on the forum as a guide. People will thank you for this.


As a MOD you still can help the community a lot, but if you leave that status now you will learn nothing from the experience you had... everyone fails when doing something new, it works like this.


Just calm down a bit, do something else in the meantime, there's a LOT of others things to do both with the Pandora and to help the community out.


Anyway I too think that the things told to you in the GTA thread were too harsh.
As to the rest of your post...

My continued status as a Mod...are now up to ED and the rest of the Mods to decide.

At any rate, I certainly am not going to be engaging in any Mod activity for a while, as I need a break from it all.

And I need some of the culture surronding all this to change, if I am ever to go back to being a Mod.  The Mods here know what I'm talking about.

For the rest of you...the culture to which I refer, quite simply, is this:

When the whole thing started to get way out of hand...not even one single Mod jumped in to say, "OK, guys, knock it off, she's had enough, leave her alone."  NOT ONE.

Instead, they chose to sit on their hands and allow the slugfest to go, completely unchecked.

This, in my estimation, is not a good way to Mod.  No matter WHO was right or who was wrong in the whole mess - it should not have been allowed to continue as long as it did, and as intense as it did.  I personally felt this as a betrayal of me by my fellow Mods.  No one had my back...NO ONE.

And that is going to change - or the Mod thing can go to heck, I have no deisre for it. 

If it was someone else, Mod or not...involved in a similar mess - I would have intervened, and publicly told the folks that it was enough, and to knock it off.  first, I would have done it privately in a PM.  And if that didn't work, I would have said so publicly.  and if it STILL continued, then I would have issued a friendly reminder for the behavior to stop...and THEN if that all didn't stop the unnecessary dogpiling...I would have darn well issued infraction points.

Because enough is enough.  Why can't some people EVER let it go?  WHY can't some people realize when someone else has FINALLY had enough?

Why the hell did it have to get this far out of hand?

I certainly have little faith in my fellow Mods ability to Mod given how out of hand they allowed this all to get.  And that being the case, I'm not sure I want to continue Modding...even if I am allowed to.  I issued a resignation, and that was basically that.

But with some here calling for me not to step down...I might consider it.  But only after I've had some time away from Modding...and only if the culture here changes such that...when someone is getting beaten up really badly - someone on the Mod team FINALLY says enough is enough and does their job to diffuse the situation.

This whole mess is a big black eye for all involved...and for the entire Mod team, too, if you ask me.
 
Hi Kumaki,


Sorry to see you're this upset. You definitely fall in the category "good folk" in my opinion and although I had to get used to your use OF CAPS every now and again and how FIRED UP you could get about stuff it al least makes you a real person. :)


Although I disagreed with you in the GTA thread I certainly don't hope you took that as a personal thing. For me it was firmly in the land of healthy discussion and I found it interesting to learn how different people looked at games like that and the last thing on my mind was attacking you on a personal level. I'm used to heated discussions with my friends where we don't pull our punches and if I overstepped any personal boundaries I apologise and will certainly try to rephrase it next time. Still standing by my points of course, the most respect I can give someone is my honest opinion instead of a sugarcoated whatever to appease them. EDIT: also I didn't check up on that thread so no clue what happened on the later pages, I'll have a look.


There is really no reason for you to leave the community. No one will get along with everybody always and if a couple of people not being your cup of tea, or you not being theirs is a good reason to bail this place would be pretty empty rather quick. And plenty of people, including me, like having you around.
 
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Timstertoo...I NEVER take anyone having a different opinion than myself as a personal offense.  My own view is that everyone has a right to be wrong (and if their opinion doesn't match mine then they are wrong..LOL)  But seriously...while this may have STARTED withthe GTA thread, it goes way beyond that thread.

It even goes way beyond anything any one individual may have said to me.  It is a direct result of the constant dogpiling which never let up.  It is a direct result of what I feel was my fellow Mods showing a complete dereliction of thier duties.

It is NOT for a Mod to decide who is right and who is wrong...in a situation such as I have been embroiled in.  It is for a Mod to make the situation not continue.  To diffuse the situation.  None of my fellow Mods saw fit to do this.  Because of that, the situation was allowed to fester and to mushroom - resulting in this.

My basic feeling is that some Mod should have decided that I'd had enough, that the dogpiling was out of control and uncalled for...and they should have issued a call for it to stop.  They refused.  Instead they sat on their hands and let a favored member of our community to continue to attack me and pick at me and needle me, because he was not in direct violation of the Forum rules as written.

Every Forum always has one or two people in it...who know how to follow every single letter of the Forum rules, while totally violating the spirit and intent of those rules.  And this was just such a case.

Were it not for the fact that I, myself was involved...were I able to see the situation from an impartial Mod standpopint - it involved two completely different people....or at least not me - I would have realized that the dogpiling was continuing...and that the recipient was getting very upset about it.  At which point, as a Mod...I would have stepped in.

I maintain that it is a Mod's job to diffuse such situations, by whatever means are necessary (and not more than is necessary) - it is NOT a Mod's place to determine who started it...who's right and who's wrong - but to simply put a stop to the situation before it gets out of control.

To that end, I would have first politely asked everyone, in PM, to just knock it off.  If it continued, I would have then posted a public statement in the thread saying that enough was enough...and tell everyone to knock it off.  None of that happened.  Instead, the other party was allowed to continue poking at me and needling me and generally getting under my skin, and get me more and more upset - which is what led to the mess.

In my opinon, my fellow Mods failed miserably in their jobs in this case.  and the entire fiasco is a black eye on everyone who was involved (including myself) - and a large black eye on the Mods who failed to contain the damage - all because one of the participants is a favored member here...who is allowed to trash other people incessantly...just because he does not EXACTLY violate the rules...he just violates the spirit and intent of them.

The rules are in place...in order to prevent what basically happened.  And it was the Mod's job to contain the damage.  Instead they chose to take sides.  Nobody had MY back in this...not a single soul.  It will take me some time to get over my feelings of hurt and betrayal over this.
 
You are a mod, aren't you?


Why didn't you just close the thread and it would have been fine. Especially, when the rpg thread got completely offtopic.


Did you post in the mod forum, asking for help?


Edit: As you stated it yourself in one of your latest posts:


You cannot expect everyone to just agree your opinions. Everyone has his own opinions. Don't be pissed off directly if they don't like yours.


Compromises need to be made.
 
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You are a mod, aren't you?

Why didn't you just close the thread and it would have been fine. Especially, when the rpg thread got completely offtopic.

Did you post in the mod forum, asking for help?

Edit: As you stated it yourself in one of your latest posts:

You cannot expect everyone to just agree your opinions. Everyone has his own opinions. Don't be pissed off directly if they don't like yours.

Compromises need to be made.
A - it would have not been seemly for me to close my own thread.
B - I still hoped to get some help on EasyRPG from the thread.

C - Yes, I posted in the Mod Forum, asking for help.  I was ignored and laughed at.  I'm quite positive they were ENJOYING watching me being torn apart and fed to the wolves.  And that is what hurts more than anything else.

No matter who was right or who was wrong...It should not have been allowed to go as far as it did...wiithout at least ONE Mod stepping in to call off the wolves.

It should have been obvious to everyone that I was being upset...and that the dogpiling was continuing.

They chose, instead of acting to stop it...to buy popcorn and enjoy watching me get ripped to shreds.

To hell with my feelings.
 
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